Table of Contents
With the shipping forecast….
it is not without a little sorrow that I cut my last connections with the Beeb. I had stopped consuming their material for quite a while and all that was left was their increasingly bizarre hate mail and my fond memories of ‘The Shipping Forecast‘.
Many a time I had woken up in the wee hours to switch on this soporific. For the sake of clarity I must add, that I am not a sailor, I just like its vibe and it gets me back to sleep.
Never intending this to be a tribute, it is beginning to feel that way. I only just found out, half way through this article that a few days ago it had been axed, with all of Long Wave stating that they had to keep up with the times. Because I liked it so much it made sense to me to emulate in a voice-over demo, below.
I had written them a letter, a surprisingly effective letter. I had just got weary of them hassling me. When one of their stooges knocked on my door it was the last straw. Their whole approach is to play on peoples’ ignorance and gaslight people into thinking they need a licence or they will get in trouble. With the help of AI I drafted a letter informing them I was not using their system and informing them that any call would be viewed as civil trespass. The threats stopped immediately but they clung to, yes like they were ship wrecked, the assertion that they reserved the right to check from time to time – end of.
Really enjoyed doing this rendition. I can see now with the all the eccentric naming conventions that it is had a poetry all of its own. None of this was taken from the BBC I would add!
Information for Nerds – The Letter
I thought i would include my letter on here, because it was very effective – all you have to do is put in your <your address> and the <date> and get it dispatched.
Resident(s) of
<Your Address>
<Date>
TV Licensing
Darlington
DL98 1TL
Re: No TV Licence Required – <Your Address>
We write to formally inform you that no television licence is required at the above address.
No live television is watched or recorded at this property, and no use is made of BBC iPlayer or any other service that would require a licence under current regulations.
Use of such services is not permitted within this property.
Please update your records accordingly and ensure that no further correspondence is sent regarding this matter unless circumstances change.
Any implied right of access to this property for the purposes of visits by TV Licensing representatives is withdrawn. Any uninvited attendance will be treated as trespass and may result in civil action.
Yours faithfully,
Resident(s)
A brief history of the Shipping Forecast
Long before weather satellites and smartphone apps, forecasting was largely a matter of observation and experience. Sailors, farmers and fishermen relied on cloud formations, wind direction and local knowledge to judge what the skies might bring. As science advanced during the nineteenth century, systematic weather recording became possible, leading to the first organised forecasting services.
In Britain, Admiral Robert FitzRoy, best known as the captain of HMS Beagle during Charles Darwin’s famous voyage, is widely regarded as the father of modern weather forecasting. In the 1860s he introduced the collection of weather observations by telegraph, allowing forecasts and storm warnings to be issued with unprecedented speed. Although some criticised the idea at the time, forecasting steadily became more accurate as observations and technology improved.
The Shipping Forecast itself became a reassuring fixture of British life, providing vital information for mariners while quietly acquiring an audience far beyond the sea. Even those with no nautical ambitions found comfort in its measured delivery, rhythmic cadence and wonderfully eccentric sea area names. Somewhere between practical bulletin and spoken poetry, it became one of those uniquely British broadcasts whose appeal was difficult to explain but instantly recognisable to anyone who had ever drifted off to sleep with the radio gently murmuring in the background.